June 13

Jun 13 - Today from Proverbs 13 we look at verse 24
"He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him."

"Come on Junior, let's put on your coat. It's time to go now."
"NO!" says the little two year old as he begins to run in the opposite direction.
Dad laughs. "Man, it just cracks me up the ways he sets his little jaw and takes off like that. The kid's got a mind of his own."
Cute. As Junior grows, dad thinks everything he does is cute. So cute, that dad could not possibly give the little guy a spanking. There is no way that anyone could say that dad hates his son. In fact, just the opposite is true - he loves that kid!
"Come on Spunky, let's get your coat on. It's time to go."
"NO!" says the little two year old as he turns to run.
Dad catches his arm and turns him. He makes Spunky look him straight in the eye. "What did daddy tell you about saying no?"
Spunky scowls and pulls away and tries to run again. Dad catches him again and gives him a firm swat on the behind.
Horror! How could a loving father swat his son for such a minor incident? Poor little guy. He's going to grow up scarred for life. He will never feel loved. His father shows more contempt for the child than he does love.
Could it be that this Proverb has been mis-translated? It just doesn't make sense to think that the father who doesn't spank hates his son. . . until we look at it from a different perspective. Let me re-word the proverb a bit, and see if it begins to make some sense: "He who spared the rod in the formative years will end up hating his son. He who loves his son in later years was careful to discipline him early." What do you think? Does that make more sense?
There is no such thing as effective passive discipline. There is no such thing as effective passive leadership. The old adage, "Let him go, he will eventually grow out of it'" applies well to a pair of blue jeans, but it just doesn't work on rebellious attitudes. If you let rebels get away with their behavior, you are reinforcing that behavior. Then, one day they will be adults. They will be out of the controls of your parental micro-management authority. They will be old enough, strong enough and free enough to make your life miserable. Their attitudes and activities will no longer be 'cute'. They will become odious to you. Spare the rod in the formative years, and you will end up hating their character and the affect that character has on your household.
Discipline applied with the right objective and a right attitude is an act of love. You are doing the child a favor, and you are doing yourself a favor. It isn't easy to physically discipline that cute little cherub - unless you are extremely angry. In that case, don't do it. . . yet. Get your emotions under control, set your mind to the purpose and value of discipline, and administer it in love, not rage. But, this also includes those times even when Junior is being 'cute'. Discipline needs to be administered when defiant, rebellious attitudes are displayed. It is applied to teach that such attitudes carry a consequence. Children who grow up without consequence to defiance are in all likelihood going to be defiant adolescents and defiant adults.
God spanks - especially those He loves. If you have an opportunity today, read Hebrews 12:4-11. Verse 11 says, "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful." That's the purpose of discipline. Spunky needs to know that defiance is unacceptable. The verse goes on to say, "Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." There's the goal. A future blessing for the disciplined, and a future blessing for the one who administers discipline.
Are you reading this and not a parent? Wondering if there is any application for you? There is. If you are in any sort of leadership position, you have a level of authority. That authority was given for the purpose of keeping order within the structure in which you serve. Whether you are a teacher, a team leader, a manager, or a corporate officer, do not be a passive leader hoping that your nicety will win the defiant over. It won't, and the defiant will continue to cause problems in your areas of responsibility. It is not hateful to properly administer discipline.
Wisdom learns the proper purpose of discipline, the proper method of discipline, and administers discipline in the proper spirit.