September 20

Sep 20 - Today from Proverbs 20 we look at verse 19
"A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much."

From all my years of experience (including the recollection of my own faults and motives), I am convinced that the basic motive for gossip is self-importance. That is why gossip falls into the sin category - it is rooted in pride. Gossip is different from a malicious lie in this; it is nurtured from a seed of perceived truth. In other words, the perpetrator does not fabricate a damaging bit of information out of nothing. Instead, he moves about seeking whatever information he can get. When something of significance appeals to his self-interests or purposes surfaces, he banks it into his 'pool of secured information' to be pulled out and elaborated upon at just the right time with just the right audience. He has no qualms about betraying the supplier of the information or about working it to his advantage in a situation. Gossip is full of half-truths, out-of-context statements, and what the media people call 'spin'. We all get good at it.
When Christ sets us free from self-importance, our propensity to gossip should, and must diminish. It is not found in the character of our Savior, and we are to continually abide in Him. It falls under the fruit of self-control, which is contrary to self-importance. The Holy Spirit urges us not to be a gossip. Wisdom instructs us to avoid getting into sensitive areas of discussion with gossips. They may be your 'friend' and confidant for the moment - but who knows what kind of a case they will be making later. They can readily take your statements, do a little doctoring, and 'spin' them to support a self-important presentation in some other circle. As a result, your own reputation can get damaged as you were misquoted and misrepresented in the situation. Being caught just one time in such a situation should be all the lesson you need not to confide in that person again.
In most cases, you needn't be personally trapped in order to detect the propensity of an acquaintance to gossip. In such cases, observation is a safer teacher than is experience. If you listen to the subject matter of an unsure, untested acquaintance long enough, you will begin to detect their focus and motives. Listen for their favorite subject matter. I heard it once said that small people talk about other people, common people talk about things, and great people talk about ideas. That's not the word of God, but it is a pretty good principle. Beware of sharing confidence with small people.
Be careful what information you entrust and to whom you entrust it. It may come back to bite you.